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Right now I am having trouble motivating myself just to put things away and start programming. I came back here after a short time, I first came here because I was inspired by OSDev, but I think it happened too soon. I really think I should choose something else to program first.

First off, I get physically tired very easily and all energy gets drained out of me. It's hard to motivate myself to do anything in life. It's like I don't have any real drive to accomplish things.

I also pick up on trying to learn to do something but later I end up getting sidetracked and go onto something else, and it repeats in a pattern. I am always told to "just do it and start programming", but it seems like people ignore the part about having to do reading. I'm not a self-starter, I feel like I am retarded.

It sounds a bit contradictory to say "I want to learn programming" but "I can't get motivated to learn programming".

If you are not a good programmer to start with then OS development is just about the worst choice you can make. Find a web site or tutorial, or buy a good book, aimed at novice programmers and forget ambitions of complicated stuff until you are comfortable with the basics. If you were learning how to race motor cars you would be better to start with a go-kart, or similar, rather than jumping into an Indy or F1 racer.

iansjack wrote:It sounds a bit contradictory to say "I want to learn programming" but "I can't get motivated to learn programming".

You know, people make resolutions, like to get fit, to get sober, to learn a foreign language and stuff, they'd like to get there, but it often takes anywhere from a lot of time to eternity to get started on those things and more to actually get somewhere. Pretty common in human life.

If you want to get fit it's probably wiser to do a little jogging first rather than entering the London Marathon. Attempting a near impossible task with inadequate training is not a great motivator.

Hi,

SeanMc wrote:First off, I get physically tired very easily and all energy gets drained out of me. It's hard to motivate myself to do anything in life. It's like I don't have any real drive to accomplish things.

It might just be the way it's been worded; but this makes me wonder if there's an underlying cause (e.g. insomnia, coeliac disease, diabetes, anaemia, etc - there's many possibilities). Maybe it's worth speaking to your doctor about it.


Cheers,

Brendan

SeanMc wrote:Right now I am having trouble motivating myself just to put things away and start programming.

That is quite common with people with Asperger's. As much as I enjoy programming, I go through periods of time where I don't have the motivation to actually sit down and write some code. This happens with other things too, and it's very annoying.

SeanMc wrote:Right now I am having trouble motivating myself just to put things away and start programming. I came back here after a short time, I first came here because I was inspired by OSDev, but I think it happened too soon. I really think I should choose something else to program first.

First off, I get physically tired very easily and all energy gets drained out of me. It's hard to motivate myself to do anything in life. It's like I don't have any real drive to accomplish things.

I also pick up on trying to learn to do something but later I end up getting sidetracked and go onto something else, and it repeats in a pattern. I am always told to "just do it and start programming", but it seems like people ignore the part about having to do reading. I'm not a self-starter, I feel like I am retarded.

• What woud you like to do the most right now?
• What step do you plan to do right next to make it possible to get the results you want immediately?

It's not so difficult if it's done in that way. This website is here to help, it just needs to apply colaboration from all of us.


The modern version of JavaScript and HTML, with all of its low level and high level features is the easiest thing you could learn, and you can already program anything with it (emulators, text editor, compilers)... using Emscripten also if you want to compile C/C++ code to JavaScript.


When it happens, it's because you have so many things you want to learn and do that you just cannot decide. If you do one you feel that you are losing your time from the point of view of all others, for each mistake and delay you suffer when you cannot do something right and it just fails.

You just need to calm down and set an immediate and concrete goal:
- What do I want to do? -Just specify the end result-
- What's the next step? -Here you have to stop any confusion and be specific, because you have to define a step to give immediately, like "make a search for the programming languages, C or Assembly, or others, to start learning". -


Use your brain to decide to perform concrete things in real life. If you stay in the same place mentally it means that you aren't using your brain, but instead it's an executable/dynamic/intelligent/self-aware worry and confusion that is using your brain instead, and draining your mental and physical energy, attention and decisions. But it can be stopped with the questions and actions above.

You may also consider writing your goals, conclusions and other things down on paper.

I would like to join in with the cheering section, but... well, that would be hypocritical of me to say the least. While I rarely have any problems with motivating myself to learn new things, that's usually the only thing I can motivate myself to do.

This isn't an exaggeration, especially this past year; most days I don't get out of bed except to eat, use the toilet, and work on my laptop (which I make a point of trying not use in bed too often because that would just make things worse). I am slowly improving, but I have had severe depression and other psychological problems my entire life, and consequently have had difficulty holding a job as well. While I have rarely been this bad, last year my life went into a death spiral after losing my job, my father (who had been supporting me after I lost my job), and my home in rapid succession, and it is no joke to say that it is only sheerest chance that I am still alive myself.

I want to give you some advice, but right now, I don't feel qualified to give it. Maybe Alice will be able to one day, if I get the nerve to set her free, but Jay is a horrible mess of a person and for now that's still the life I am living.

I don't know if it would help for sure, but, perhaps, a direct personal help could do. I mean, if someone could visit you and work with you on programming or whatever it is. A little push here, a little bit of advice there, some encouragement. Simple tasks to solidify new knowledge and skills, more complex tasks for growth. Perhaps, when you have a better foundation, things won't seem as daunting as they are now. With programming specifically, I think a lot can be done over something like skype and screen sharing. No strangers coming in your house, no driving to reach you. Now, you need an angel to do that for/with you. It'll be quite a commitment for both.

I'd agree with alexfru. Also, if you could afford "coding camp," maybe, it'd be worth it? By the way, I'll be glad to help you over Facebook messages or something--if it's helpful.

Maybe, you think you need to learn programming because of social pressure or just because it's cool, etc. You may not want to learn programming.

There can be a health related solution - just take some fitness. A bit of extra energy can help you to improve your mental power. But it should be long enough to warm you as required, a run of at least 5 minutes, for example.

And first you just should tell yourself - I want to try every advice here. Or it's just another soap that you will forget very soon.

Schol-R-LEA wrote:most days I don't get out of bed except to eat, use the toilet, and work on my laptop (which I make a point of trying not use in bed too often because that would just make things worse).

Pretty scary. How a man can kill himself. Are all your passions too far to be reached? May be they are just over the hill before you? And yes, you must go uphill to get them.

But may be Brendan's medical advice is the first thing you can do - just visit a doctor.

I am already seeing a therapist - a pretty good one so far, given that I just moved to Athens from a town just north of Atlanta, and had no established support here - and after my first appointment with the clinical psychiatrist here, I just changed my anti-depressants to a newer drug (apparently, Cymbalta was too closely related to Wellbutrin, so the high resistance I'd developed to the latter was affecting the former), so that's at least covered. Also, my brother and sister-in-law talked me into letting them cover my rent and other expenses while I wait for my Disability application to be processed, and my mother found a decent lawyer to handle my case (I'll be seeing him later today about some paperwork, in fact). And TBH, just getting out of the nightmare that is commercial IT has been like a new lease on life.

It was my sister-in-law who correctly pointed out that the jobs I was working were making things worse, rather than better, and that I had subconsciously been undermining my job-hunting because I knew it would be a mistake to deal with yet another non-win scenario, and commercial IT is practically nothing but no-win scenarios (they pay well, so if money is all that matters to you, fine, but when the men come to take you to your all-expenses resort vacation in a rubber room, don't say I didn't warn you). Their concern for my well being, at a time when I had lost all of my own, is something I don't know how I will ever repay.

And... maybe it really is time to be honest with myself about some issues I have been avoiding since childhood. I'm seeing that a lot of what I thought were unrelated problems are actually deeply entwined with each other, and that I need to deal with all of them together. It's frightening - admitting that your public persona has been a flat-out lie for forty-seven years is not easy - but this is an opportunity I cannot ignore.

Schol-R-LEA wrote:I just changed my anti-depressants to a newer drug

Oh, this is a bad western habit of being life-time drag addict. Your will and nothing more can help you. But for the will to rise you there (may be) should be somebody who can increase your motivation. And apparently - it's not the psychiatrist. Even if there's nobody around (as is the case for an empty room) you always can go on a walk an try to look at people around. What you can loose if you'll try to speak to them? Hello! You are so beautiful! How are you? Can I tell you how unhappy I am? Don't hesitate, they will be glad to see you

Schol-R-LEA wrote:It was my sister-in-law who correctly pointed out that the jobs I was working were making things worse

May be you should read about the great depression and it's infamous famine fueled by the lack of jobs? How ancient spartans treated a psychiatrist? But yes, a kind of therapy was possible for religious people with the priests of those days.

Schol-R-LEA wrote:I'm seeing that a lot of what I thought were unrelated problems are actually deeply entwined with each other, and that I need to deal with all of them together. It's frightening - admitting that your public persona has been a flat-out lie for forty-seven years is not easy - but this is an opportunity I cannot ignore.

It's a reason to start new life. New public person after a complete overhaul. Cheer it with the traditional "let's do it!"