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JackScott wrote:Now, why can't teachers just tell us stuff like that, instead of (relatively) useless things like integrating square roots?

Solar wrote:@ jakh:

Been there. It took me years to get over my first big love, and I still think about her sometimes, almost twenty years later. I know how little anything I can say will help you.

But think about this: She left you. Tragic implications aside, that means she didn't love you back the same way. Big, epic, unconditional love only works if both feel that way - otherwise, both will suffer greatly. Take your time grieving, but don't destroy yourself over it. Someone capable of such love will find someone who loves right back.

quok wrote:

SandeepMathew wrote:I voted for option 1 . I will never have a girl friend . I am happy staying single and prefer staying single .I will not mary. I am a freaking weirdo . There are other reasons as well

1) I want to reduce my country's surplus population ( least thing i can do for my country )

2) Married people tend to very selfish , If i stay unmarried I can do something good for the community as whole , without too much concerns about myself.

3) I do not want to waste a womans life , It is better that they stay away from me.

4) If i ever have kids , they will be called sons of sandeep --- 'Worst thing i can do to them'

5) Finally do not misunderstand me , I in my entire life has not treated a woman with disrespect , or involved in a relationship with any woman . I am supressing my internal emotions for a greater cause .

Regards
Sandeep

I'm not meaning to sound disrespectful of your decisions, but there were a few things in your post that I thought I'd point out.

1) Reducing the surplus population is a noble goal, but there's other ways to do it without sacrificing the benefits you may get by having a healthy relationship with a member of the opposite gender. Both times my wife was pregnant, her pregnancies were very rough, and there were a lot of health concerns for both her and the baby. So after our daughter was born, and after lots of discussion about the matter, I went to see a urologist and had things taken care of. We decided that we still would like to have another child, and we'd like to adopt. Unfortunately there's lots of unwanted children out there in need of a loving family, and we intend to provide a home for one.

2) I do know quite a few married couples that are very selfish, but on the whole I tend to find that a happily married couple is more caring and giving together than either one is capable of on their own. I've always donated some time and goods to charity and those in need, but since I have gotten married I find that I spend more time doing those things. Back to the unwanted children thing, my wife and I are also about to start attending classes to be foster parents. We've signed up with the appropriate county and state agencies so that if there's some reason a child needs a place to stay for a night, a week, or a month, there will be one more open slot. There have been entirely too many cases where a child that should have been taken away from abusive parents and put someplace safe was left in that abusive situation simply because there was nobody to take the child. Some people will point out that the government does provide a stipend for each foster child, and some people are in it just "for the money", but for us it's all about improving the quality of life for a child, and "doing the right thing."

3) Plenty of studies have been done that show married people are generally happier, healthier, and live longer, more fruitful lives. Of course, that in and of itself is no reason to get married, and here in the US the divorce rate is nearly 50%.

4) There's a lot worse things that could be done to a child than whatever damage you think may be done by their name. For me, I couldn't imagine life without my children. They're most of the reason that I am who I am today, and I find that I'm a much, much better person since they came into my life.

Finally, while I applaud your decision to act toward a greater cause, and I wish more people in this world adopt that way of thinking, I don't really agree with your Vulcan ideology on emotion. There's plenty of ways to further a cause without having to sacrifice so much of who you are, or potentially could be. That being said, perhaps you don't see it as sacrifice.

Again, I mean no disrespect with this post, and I apologize in advance if you or anyone else is offended. I think I'll step down from the altar now and get back to work.

distantvoices wrote:...lady who's put poison in my food...

SandeepMathew wrote:To his embaressement , I found her image in his computer zipped,renamed and saved in a hidden location ..... : .
Anyways the love thing is too complicated for me .... I think it is better to live without it

bewing wrote:I'm single, too. I had a couple of very fleeting opportunities to get to know a couple of really interesting girls -- a decade or more ago -- but I accidentally blew my chances.

Theoretically, I'd like to get into a relationship. However, what I have been finding is that American women my age have been through so many bad relationships that they are seriously "damaged". American women seem to be magnetically drawn to bad/angry/dangerous/cruel men, when they are young. The women end up with anger issues, trust issues, issue issues, other "baggage", & etc. It gets so bad that they are not interesting anymore. In other words, I've basically given up in disgust.

So, my advice on the subject is to find a nice girl, get married fairly young -- and be nice to her so that she doesn't turn into a big drag. Her future psychology depends on how you treat her now.